|"The Penn State coaching staff is not playing right now bruh!"|
Well...when the NCAA walked into the joint on Monday the only cats sitting around the table were Penn State. Once the sword was drawn and it hit the table it was devastating. He got off into their pockets for $60 million, hit them with a 4 year bowl ban, vacated all wins from 1998 to 2011(111 wins in all) and they must reduce 10 initial and then 20 scholarships a year over the next 4 years.
However, Nino did do the current players a solid because he knew that they had nothing to do with this foolishness. So they all were given the opportunity to transfer immediately to other FBS schools without penalty. That means that they could bounce without having to sit out the normal year before they're eligible to play again.
Let's keep it real or all the way 100, whichever comes 1st! Y'all know that joint looked like the LA Riots or Hurricane Katrina within 20 minutes of that announcement. Boyz were literally running down the street with football players under their arms all morning long bruh! I saw Urban Meyer pull up with Barry the Buckeye in an Ice Cream truck trying to lure cats to Columbus! Bob Stoops showed up in the Sooner Schooner itself with Boomer and Sooner bumpin' that DJ Khaled "All I do is win!" joint as loud as he could. He started loading boyz up like the Oklahoma Land Rush of 1889.
Then ole Nick Saban pulled up in the Red Escalade with white interior sitting on 26's with Big Al riding shotgun bumpin' that "Sweet Home Alabama" with the national title game playing on the TV's in the head rests! He was talking mad noise pulling an empty U-haul only for those cats with the skillz to play in Tuscaloosa. Then Les Miles completely shout the joint down when he pulled up with the "Hat" cocked gangsta left with Mike the Tiger lounged in the back seat bumpin' that Cashin' Out joint hollerin' at the kittens walking down the street. Ole Les, on the other hand, was talking like he's got a mouth full of bubblicious as usual. While the new Penn State coaching staff was riding through campus playing that Chief Keef "I Don't Like!" as they watched their players role out like Ludacris.
Hey when Nino said that cats could immediately bounce they weren't playing around. They were loading boyz up and calling their parents from the highway. It was like, "Hey Mrs So & So we've got your son and we're headed to Columbus, Ann Arbor, Baton Rouge, Austin, Norman, Gainsville etc but he'll be just fine. Whatever he forgot in State College we'll pull a P. Diddy and buy it when we get there. Don't trip cuz he's in good hands! He'll call you in a few days and tell Big Momma not to worry either. "
The only cats that should stay are those guys that are senior starters or those that are 2nd or 3rd on the depth chart that could start as a result of boyz leaving that wouldn't play anywhere else. Otherwise, the dorm should look like a drug raid this morning bruh! Drawers pulled open and stuff thrown everywhere as cats were diving out of the windows to get out of town.
Most people looked at the sanctions as the Death Penalty saying that they were suddenly reduced to SMU and would be done for at least 25 years but I completely disagree. First of all, SMU is a small private school in Dallas, Texas that was only good in 1923 &' 26, in '31 & '35 and when Doak Walker was a beast from '47 to '48. In the early '80's they picked up the Death Penalty because they were crazy disrespectful to the Godfather that had warned them multiple times about paying boyz. That's why they were able to have the "Pony Express" Eric Dickerson and Craig James. They've never recovered because they've had to compete with Texas and Oklahoma not to mention the other football schools in the state to get players and their academic requirements are killing them. Just think what that type of punishment would have done to Notre Dame in the '70's and '80's bruh! Well that's SMU. It's already hard enough to recruit because of academics.
Penn State, on the other hand, doesn't have that same geographical and academic problem. Let's keep it real! It's been a mediocre program for the past 20 years anyway. Also, once they get off of probation in 5 years they'll still have the loyalty of all of the delusional fans that are still supporting Joe Paterno even though he's been proven to be dirty. Those duns have kids. In the Pennsylvania they've got absolutely no competition in the recruiting game like SMU has had over the years. So in my opinion, they could be back to Penn State in less than 10 if they do it right.
They only have to get back to being a mediocre program to be back bruh! It's not like they have to be a top 10 joint because they weren't in the first place. They just have to get back to being 4th or 5th in the Big Ten! There's only 2 and half teams in the conference anyway; Ohio State, Michigan and Wisconsin makes up the half of the joint. It's not like they're playing in the SEC or the the Southwestern Conference like SMU was at the time of the Death Penalty.
Sure, they been reduced to Western Michigan overnight but the secret weapon to getting the same caliber players to come back to Happy Valley is Phil Knight bruh! All they have to do is pull an Oregon! Get rid of those hideous Joe Paterno practice uniforms that they've worn for years and put the Swag Sauce into them joints. Get rid of everything that reminds people of JoePa so start with the uniforms. Put together 50 different uniform combo's with glow in the dark helmets and pants with matching shoes and gloves and boyz will come running to play for the Nittany Lions again.
There's too much brand loyalty in Pennsylvania for them not to. Don't tell me they won't because they showed up in Eugene when they were garbage and had absolutely no history of winning. Who else reading this joint knew that Ahmad Rashard went to Oregon until they just recently started winning bruh? Put the shine and some spice on those uniforms and kids will show up. Trust me, I've got a 15 year old and these kids now days are different! Stop me when I start lying bruh!
Holla At Ya Boy!
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Clearly I'm having fun with this joint when I talk about the coaches pulling up.