The old timers would always say, “Sin will take you farther than you want to go, keep you longer than you want to stay and cost you more than you want to pay.” Lucillle Ball once said, “The secret of staying young is to live honestly, eat slowly, and lie about your age.”
Manti Te’o thought she said, “The secret to winning the Heisman is to live dangerously, eat everything and lie about having a dead girlfriend.” Y’all gone start listening me bruh! I told you back in November in the Hot Joint entitled "The Heisman Hustle" that boyz were trying to give Manti the Heisman off of the sympathy vote and he darn near won it too.
He got boyz for all of the other national awards because he scammed unsuspecting suckas in the media. The problem for them is that they can't go back and recoup their votes because you know they only voted for him because of his story! So he essentially robbed the joint with a butter knife.
Back in September it was reported that both his grandmother and his girlfriend died less than six hours apart and now we find out that his girl never even existed. This dun pulled a fast one on his teammates, the university and the clowns that voted for him and almost got away with it if it wasn’t for Deadspin smelling a skunk on the line and investigating. That's why I kept saying that he was a fraud because he was only getting press because he played through the deaths.
Now Te’o is doing what Big Momma calls layering. He’s telling more lies to cover up the first joint. Now this dun is saying that he was a victim of an online hoax and boyz are even believing that. Let’s keep it real or all the way 100, whichever comes 1st! How can you be the victim and you made up the broad out of thin air?
According to the South Bend Tribune he says his dad says he met the chick in 2009 after the Stanford/Notre Dame game in Palo Alto. Now he’s saying that he met her online and never saw her. That it was only an online relationship.
Let’s stop right there pimpin’! Online relationships are for nerds and geeks that can’t pull. You are the MOST popular cat on campus and when you’re the freaking man, you don’t pull you choose! So tell that to some dun with an ear on his hip bruh! You knew the story was fishy when a boy tells you his girl dies and he doesn’t go to the funeral, doesn't have her obituary in his locker or better yet, he isn't rockin' the R.I.P. t-shirt on the yard like all of these young cats do now days! You know all of the brothers on the squad were waiting for him to pull that joint out and pour out some liquor for the homies that ain't here but he never did!
But what do I know, he’s Samoan maybe in his culture they don’t go to funerals and act a fool like black folks. Because if Leroy’s grandmother and girlfriend had died on the same day they would have had both caskets in full view and boyz would be anteing up to pay the funeral director his bread. It’s never going to be a question as to whether they died because Big Momma would have been trying to climb into the casket with grandma.
Y’all know how they have to tackle boyz and drag them away from the casket to even bury the joint. This goes on for at least 20 minutes because they have to keep stopping to pull duns off so they can cover it with dirt. So you don’t have to worry about a black kid running that scam cuz we ain’t missin’ no funerals playboy! Not with all of that foolishness!
Manti’s even got cats believing that he used to sit on the phone for 8 hours at a time as his girl slept while she was sick. I heard one report say that he would wake up in the morning and pick up the phone only to hear her breathing. Now unless she was a Pachyderm on a breathing treatment with the phone strapped to her mouth that ain’t happening. We all have fallen asleep on the phone as kids and by the time you wake up that joint is on the floor or somewhere deep in the bowels of the bed. So if he still heard her breathing she was a Tyrannosaurus Rex with asthma, acid reflux and smokers breath.
After all of this foolishness we find out that his boy, Ronaiah Tuiasosopo of the football famous Tuiasosopo's, was the clown behind his girl’s fake Twitter account. It's his boy because he hooked up with him when Notre Dame went to LA to play USC according to both of their Twitter accounts.
So now what bruh? I’m just waiting for the next lie and so on and so forth because he’s so deep in the hole now that he’s disoriented. The rule is, whenever you find yourself in a hole stop digging. This dun is so deep at this point he needs oxygen. His freaking lungs are about to explode from the pressure and he’s not smart enough to just come on up for air.
He’s the Joe on First 48 in the interrogation room with blood on his shoes, scratches on his face, the pistol and rope has his fingerprints, the victim’s cell phone and keys to the car are in his pockets and he’s still lying.
Not only did he get his butt handed to him in the national title game. He’s completely made a fool out of himself for trying to win the Heisman that he should never have even been in the running for in the first place with a lie. He and ole Lance Armstrong must have studied at the same academy for liars and cheaters with Bernie Madoff teaching in his underwear. Like I’ve been saying all year, he’s gonna be Brian Bozworth all over again, all hype and no substance! He’ll be in and out of the league faster than a robbery or a panty raid at the old folk's home on Saturdays because his draft status is falling like debris not because of this foolishness but because he wasn't as good as advertised bruh.
Please don't walk away from this joint confused! Manti Te'o and his boy ran a scam to win the Heisman on the sympathy vote but it didn't work. They ran up in the Downtown Athletic Club with a ski mask on and some firecrackers. They scared a few boyz but couldn't get away with it. Now jig is up and the skunk has been shot! Stop me when I start lyin’!
Holla At Ya Boy!
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This joint is completely my opinion!